Thursday, February 2, 2012

"Your Blog is Becoming a Fire Hazard"-Quote from my Husband

  • So, my husband was BBQ'ing some chicken breasts that we had marinated all day in yummy teriyaki sauce. He got the charcoal going, waiting for the coals to be red hot. 
  • After coals are hot enough, he puts chicken on the grill
  • He then walks inside the house (as it is cold outside, so he keeps coming in and out,as opposed to the summertime when he just stands over the BBQ with a beer in one hand)
  • I am sitting on the couch, with my laptop next to me.
  • I excitedly exclaim "I have 17 followers now" Followed by, "Did you read the post I wrote about C?"
  • He then sits next to me on couch, and proceeds to talk with me about my blog. Conversation going like this:
 "I am really glad I bought you this laptop for Christmas. Seeing you really enjoying it makes me feel good about the purchase"

"I am too. You know how I stay up late at night? That is when I always imagined myself writing. While you were sleeping, but I never wanted to go downstairs and sit at the desk. Now I can be up in bed, writing"

"I can tell how much you are enjoying your blogging. Like it is bringing 'you out' like you are 'blossoming' or something. This has been great for you."

"Oh babe, thank you for being so supportive. I was afraid my new love affair with my laptop was going to start bumming you out. Or you were going to start getting sick of my blog talk. Which by the way, some of these ladies are really funny. You should let me read some to you sometime" 

"Oh fer sure, yeah looking forward to it"  - In between  watching football and basketball, working, fishing, fishing, and working, planting a new palm tree, going to the beach, watching sports, and making a new fishing rod. 

"Ohh, Babe, you are so supportive of my writing and my blog. I love that you actually listen to me talk about it, and that you actually care. Wow, pookie, snookie, lovey dovey, you are the bestest!!"

"Of course I love hearing you go on, and on,and on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on......." - If I listen to her, maybe she'll repay me later with some lovin'

"Aww, babe! Hugs!!"

" SHIT!! FUCK!! THE BARBECUE!" -goes RUNNING out to the porch to find flames shooting out from under the lid of his little charcoal grill.

I look up and can see the reflections of the flames in one of our glass picture frames on the wall. Crap, he's gonna be pissed!

I only hear muffled yells coming from outside, but they went a little something like this:


Then the sliding glass door opens, he grabs a spatula and tongs, goes back outside where he proceeds to peel the black layer of burnt skin off of the chicken breasts. But the grill had heated up to such a high temperature, that he was only able to peel little bits off at a time, before having to stand back from the heat and take a break. 

I, on the other hand, was standing inside, staring at him through the sliding glass door. I was trying to keep the smirk on my face hidden. I don't know why, but sometimes situations like this happening to my husband make me laugh. Evil, I know!

"Shhhhiiiittttt, this is HOT! The chicken is ruined, I got most of the burnt skin off, but..........Shit!"

Then he came inside....... 
and all of the LOVEY DOVEY 
I love your BLOGGY WOGGY
BLOSSOM WOSSOM went out the door
and was replaced with this...........



*Wow, blogs are more powerful than I realized.
MY blog has fire starting powers!
What other blog can make that claim?

I wonder what my toothbrush can do........

* the chicken turned out fine after we peeled off the burnt layers,hubby calmed down, and he has gone back to his supportive ways. He'd better be supportive and nice.

He wouldn't want my blog and I lightin his ass on fire..........!!!


  1. Ha! I'm always secretly happy if my husband does something dumb. I figure it makes up for all of the dumb stuff that I do. Vindication!

    1. Equality in doing dumb stuff is the glue that holds a marriage together! I hate when my side of the score card has one to many tally marks. Oh, but who's keeping score? (me)

  2. Hahahahaha! Great stuff! I bet the evil side of you was thinking, 'And now I've got something to blog about later muhahahahahah!'

    My blog too has amazing powers. It has the power to move people...away from their computer screen.

    On a side note, I just have to say J.R. that in the short time that I've been following you, your writing style has started to change. Hubby is very perceptive about the changes you've made and that's now being reflected in your blog.

    Confidence exudes from your writing and for me, you just keep getting better and funnier, with each new post. :)

    1. That is exactly what I was thinking, then ran inside grabbed my phone, and ran back out to take a picture.It was all set up too perfectly for me, and with his quote, he was askin for it. ;)

      Side note- I love telling stories. I love talking. I love making people laugh. All three of them separately, only make up some of my personality. But all three of them together, oooze out into my writing.
      I was dipping my toe in the big pool of blogging at first, but now it is like I'm divin in. I am a super open person, but with a private side. The private side of me was not sure about blogging at first, and then my more open, obnoxious side started bullying the private side, telling her to loosen up. Obnoxious is much stronger than private, and I think she is winning. Although Private wanted to hide in a cave for a week when Obnoxious told everyone about their Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Oh Well!
      Thank you for the compliment Lily!

  3. Well I for one, am sure glad the obnoxious side won out!

  4. It's good to have power. Especially Fire Power. *evil maniacal laughter*

    Hey! I have an Obnoxious Side too! How cool is THAT?

  5. Lily- Yes, the obnoxious side makes for good stories. She is a bit fun if I do say so myself!

    Jo- Everyone, EVERYONE should have an obnoxious side. Otherwise, YAWN!!! Bore!!!


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