Thursday, April 18, 2013

Fear of Teenagers


So my internet homepage yesterday had a list of strange phobias that you may or may not have heard of.

One of them being Ephebiphobia - Fear of Teenagers.

So that explains the debilitating pain that comes over me every day at 3:18 p.m. when I hear the front door open, and the massive whirl of Hollister perfume and teen girl chatter fills up the front entry way.
Followed by a firing squad of questions/comments from my 14 and 16 year old teen daughters.

"I need to find a prom dress, NOW"
"What are we having for dinner? Fish? YUCK!"
"Who was in my room today? Mom, why do you let K play with my stuff? I don't need a six year playing in my room!"
"Can I go out to dinner with Trent tonight? I mean, I don't like fish, so it'd probably be better if I don't eat here."
"Why can't I go out to dinner with him??? I already finished my homework!"
"What? My teacher is crazy.......why did she email you that? I DID turn that in, she is lying!"
"Mom, can I talk to you privately?........can I borrow money?"
"Mom, can you take me to Target, or the mall? I told my friends that we could buy our matching outfits for our dance final...........Yes, they'll pay you back, Geez Mom!!"
"Mom, can you help me get this stain out? Ryan and Troy had a Juice Box war at lunch today."
"Guess what, we are officially, and I mean O-FISH-UH-LEE, the only two people left at school whose parents won't let them have iPhones! You know how embarrassing our pho..........."


"How bout a 'Hi mom'?"

"How was your day mom?"

"That lunch you packed us today was yummy mom!"

"We were just getting ready to ask you that mom. I swear!"

"We do love you mom!"

"That salad was really good......even our friends were jealous."

"You need a hug mom?"


*I always like to add my 'J.R. Disclaimer' at the bottom of these rants. A little something positive to balance out the negative.
The 'Prom Dress/Fish Hater'? She offered to pay for her own prom dress with her paycheck. Sweet right?
The 'Take me to Target / Mall' daughter- She just got a 4.2 GPA on her last report card, and the second highest mark on a surprise Geometry test.

But.......................... the fear still exists. PMS'y teen girls are always creepin around the corner. 4.2 GPA's and money offering aside........Ephebiphobia - It's real. Look it up.


  1. OMG You live with me!b I can't find you, but you must be here. I was just writing about my special needs children.

    1. I'm right over here, look to your left...

  2. I've had this FOR YEARS. I may need therapy and/or medication (stonger) during the teen years. It seems even the good ones like yours can be trying!

    1. Therapy and medication? Hey, have you been listening in on my conversations with my doctor?

  3. I am so proud that you didn't get your kids an iPhone!!! My niece is like a crack head with hers and flunking a few classes because she texts and tweets and vines every second of the day. She should be glad that I'm not her mom. That thing would be gone.
    YOu have sweet girls. I know some nightmares.
    You're doing something right! xo

    1. Don't be too proud Tina, I cannot promise that we won't eventually cave to some great 'iphone upgrade,discount deal'. As of now, still holding out, and staying strong, but teens can wear you down.
      Hey, we lasted this long right?
      They are sweet girls, but when they are not sweet, well, Mama crys:(

  4. The most I get is a grunt and a look of disdain. :)

    1. Oh, I get grunts, disdain, and more grunts too. ;)

  5. Oh my god that sounds terrifying. Thank god neither of my kids will ever grow up to be teenagers.. oh wait. *shudders*

    1. Hey, you found a way to keep yours young? Wanna let us in on the secret ;)


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