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Friday, December 7, 2012

I am totally supportive when my husband is on a diet.....like totally...I promise! I SWEAR!! WHAT?!?!?


I am just going to say it! I am just going to shout the words out, and finally be set free of the guilt!

Ready?

O.K. - So, YES I admit. I have a metabolism that most people would kill for. 

There!!! I Said It! 

Now, with that being said. I probably have the clogged arteries most people would die from.

I am trying to eat healthier. I really am! I actually grew up on healthy food, but I also love junk food! 

My Husband? Not so lucky in the metabolism department............Sorry Honey (sad face inserted)

So every once in a while he gets into his little health kicks. Tells me he wants to start walking, eating better, using the laundry organizing station    errrrr, I mean the exercise bike. So on, and so on! Then there is always the discussion that starts with a look. A look he gives me as I am chomping on my Lays Potato Chips, followed by a Dr. Pepper chaser. 

"Babe.......I need your support! You have to start buying healthier foods. It'll do all of us good;you, me and even the kids. Fruits, vegetables, unsweetened cereals....all of it. Babe, you gotta do this for me.Stop filling the kitchen up with junk! Please!"

I actually listened this time. I listened, because he was right. Every time he mentions eating better, I wind up coming home with Chips Ahoy and Oreos. ( all Nabisco products buy one get one 1/2 off) I can't pass that up. BBQ Lays and Cheddar Sour Cream (Coupon for two for two dollars? Whhhaaatttt!!?? Of course I'm getting them) 
I put them in the cupboard, then lecture him when he finally caves and starts munching on cookies instead of the carrots I bought him.

I realized that this game we played was potentially costing him his health. My husband being my savior, my rock, my world and more. How could I not listen?
How could I keep bringing sugar, salts, and greasy lard into the kitchen when all the poor guy is trying to do is just lose a few pounds and feel better about his health.

So I did it guys! I did it! We went grocery shopping together, him and I. Carrots, Hummus, Strawberries, grapes, raspberries. Yogurt and Granola, whole grain bread, Garlic Powder to replace the Garlic SALT! Who needs potato chips when you can crunch on one of these little suckers.......Yup, that's right! A Carrot! 




Fast forward 2 days. I am still technically being supportive, because technically he said 'not to bring that junk into the kitchen anymore' So technically I am following the rules. My new found guilty pleasure has not stepped foot in the kitchen. In fact my friend Joe; Trader Joe to you people........well he is staying tucked away up in our bedroom. Hidden from the eyes of the husband and children. 



Milk Covered Potato Chips! 
I never claimed to be a Saint! And these devilishly, delicious concoctions of the sweet and salty mix are not in the kitchen. Hubby does even know about the secret house guest I have living in our home. 
Oh Trader Joe, you  Crazy Concoction Producing Genius
They are well hidden

Well, not really well hidden, but lets face it. 
My husband has no need, desire, or even the tiniest bit of curiosity to look into my mess of a craft supply / junk holder of an Armoire.
Don't open the bag honey.......DON'T STEP INTO THE LIGHT!!!

So hidden away from his slow metabolism, are my treats. My goodies; my happiness!

What you don't know won't kill you! 


It may just kill your wife one day when her unhealthy ways finally catch up with her.
And I think they are. 
In my next post I will describe how a date night at the bowling alley has me needing an ice pack and heating pad. 
Didn't know bowling could be so strenuous. 
Fast metabolism does not = in shape

Carrots, here I come. 

2 comments:

  1. Hahahahaha! Oh this is so me.. Not the awesome metabolism - bleh - but the hiding of the food and not even because anyone is on a diet, simply because I have children that I swear behave like starving ethiopians when snacks are brought into the house and so what's a mom to do?? Well, hide them of course! Oh.. And yeah.. Trader Joe is my boy toy on the side.. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am also secretly waiting for him to take a look at my blog, and then hear the creak of the armoire doors open. Hasn't happened yet. Trader Joe cookies, chocolate covered chips, chocolate almond popcorn, and candied pecans are still safe.............for now.

      Also, metabolism or not, I am a food hider no matter what. And you are right CHILDREN! I swear they have radar for it, and in a matter of seconds it is devoured.

      Delete

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