HOW TO STALK YOUR NEWLY LICENSED TEENAGE DAUGHTER, LESSON PLAN 1

Is that them? Is that the top of her car in the drive thru? It has to be. She loves McDonalds.

On Monday, December 10, 2012 at 8:43 a.m. our 16 year old daughter became a member of the Licensed Drivers Club.

On Monday, December 10, 2012 at 9:13 as her and our 14 year old pulled out of the DMV parking lot......my husband and I became members of the Parents Who Stalk Their Teens Club.

Part #1

Make sure you are staring all teary eyed and emotional at the CORRECT car in the McDonalds drive thru.

They had asked if they could get fast food breakfast, and then drive to school. We said 'yes'. They took off out of the lot, We got stuck at a red light.

We come down the hill of a major road and see them in the left turn lane, we think we are being slick going straight so that we can pull into the shopping center across the highway and stalk  lovingly watch as she orders her first real licensed driver Egg McMuffin.

Is that even her car? Wait, that isn't even her!!! Where are they?

Part #2

When you lose em, text the 14 year old passenger (never the driver) and nonchalantly ask if they have 'made it to school yet? Where did they wind up going to eat? Yada Yada'  Even though you know darn well they are still on the road, have not made it to school yet and 'wind up going to eat' is your way of asking 'WHERE ARE YOU EATING RIGHT THIS VERY SECOND????'

Success! 14 year old texts back saying

 "No, we are not at school yet. We came to Robertos, by the medical building." 

With screeching tires, we haul ass to Robertos. Breakfast Burritos; OF COURSE!  Surveillance under way!

Eventually they come out, (taking a bit of their sweet ol' time I have to say) and hopefully this is not a pre-cursor to their days of ditching. 

A few miles into it we catch up to them. It was a bit hard to try to stay hidden behind her, as she was thankfully driving a bit cautious and slow, and we couldn't keep stopping traffic just so that we could 'hang back, and not get caught stalking.'

They laughed at us in the rear view mirror at the red light before their school. I thought we would have U-turned to head home at that point, but hubby won the 'Crazy Parent Award' (an award usually saved for good ol' super freak mom)and followed them all the way into the student parking lot. Made sure she parked o.k., reminded her that she is now in charge of not only her life, but her sisters (No pressure put on her at all) blew her a kiss, gave a thumbs up and we took off.

Part #3

This lesson has nothing to do with stalking, but just a lesson on the Parents Place in the Pyramid of teenageland!

Once you are no longer needed to be the 25 and older driver of a 'Permit Carrying' Teen, you are no longer needed to be in the front seat. 

What happens when you say you want to go to the Dollar Tree?

B grabs her keys and says 

"I'll take you"

You smile and say

"How nice! Now you get to Chauffeur me around"

You walk out into the cold evening air with your 16 year old and 14 year old...

You automatically reach for the front seat passenger handle, and are greeted with a

"ummmm, K is going to sit up front with me. She is the D.J. of the stereo. Plus......you don't have to sit up front and help me anymore......... I have my actual license now"

This is my back seat view of B's car.
And I think they are getting a kick out of it.