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Thursday, January 26, 2012

I can't sleep,and THIS is what goes through my head??!!



I wrote this post after a sleepless night a couple of nights ago. It is a bunch of jumble, mixed with actual sentences, mixed with more jumble. I saved in drafts and forgot to publish (that is how tired I was) 
I can't sleep.But I'm tired!
Does Excedrin really have that much caffeine in it?
Could that be why I feel dead tired,but am grinding my teeth at the same time?


I am super tired!Extremely exhausted! Where you can't stop yawning, and one eye is even drooping.  I thought for sure as soon as my head hit the pillow I'd be sound asleep in slumber land, but noooooooooooooo!!!!!!!! This did not happen, I tossed, I turned, I mumbled really awful cuss words (like the really, really awful ones)  So I gave up! I turned the T.V. on hoping that staring at the screen would help speed up the sleepytime process. I had about 5 Law & Order SVU's recorded, and I figured I would get started on them. What happened next? Well I marathoned it. Watched em' all!!! I want to say this though. A word of advice! Weekly episodes of SVU, I can handle. 6 episodes back to back, I would think twice about.That much SVU in one time period is not good for the mind.The show is phenomenal! It rocks (even with Elliott gone) But the subject matter is never easy, so after that marathon,( mixed with a night of insomnia which is never good for my wandering mind) I am warning my son never,EVER to send away for a  Russian Mail Order Bride, because the Russian mafia will hunt him down, demand money, and kill his new wife. My daughter will be forewarned to never, EVER step off a bus in New York, and confuse the kindness of a young man for the kindness of a pimp.I will never let my child take the subway to school alone, even if I practiced with them for a week straight and gave them a new cell phone in case of emergency.Oh wait we don't have subways here by the beach.Pretty much, my children will never go to New York. Kidding, about the New York thing, (one of my daughters wants to go there when she graduates, so I told her we'd start looking into it. NYU, here we come! Actually I think she just wants to go shopping in New York, I am the one thinking College. She is thinking Fashion) Every city, every town has their problems.Even Sunny San Diego!  But boy that show can mess a mom up. I need to take a mental break from Law & Order SVU.

So I turned off the T.V. at about 2:00 a.m. and waited for my body to just give in, and relax.

Doo, doo,doo, la la la!! Ummm, o.k.


Wow my husband breathes loud


Is that the cable box making that sound? 


What is that sound?


Is water dripping?


Should I just go downstairs and have a bowl of Reeses Puff Cereal? God that cereal is good!


I hate walking downstairs late at night......why am I such a scaredy cat?


Should I wake M up and tell him I can't sleep?? No, that's mean


Did I set the coffee pot timer?


I wonder why he never sets the coffee pot timer? 


Why am I the only one who gets the coffee pot ready?


I'm gonna boycott being the coffee wife. See if he notices, see if he does it. 


He's a good husband. 


Did I save that love note he left in my car the other day?


Shit, I hope I didn't throw it away.


My car is a mess. 


I should have put money away for College for the kids


I shouldn't beat myself up for not doing that. Lots of people don't!


They can get student loans.


GOD, Why am I even thinking of College. So far none of the older ones show any interest.That could change though. O.K. J.R. stop stressing, deep breaths. 
My five year old may want to go. If I start saving now, what will that add up to?............
Will the light from phone calculator wake him up? 


Poor guy, deserves to sleep. He works so hard. I love him!


But he could set the coffee timer sometime. I mean atleast once a week.


God he is snoring, annoying! I should plug his nose!


Oh, he stopped snoring on his own, thank god!


Law & Order stuff, Wow! that last episode disturbed me. I'm gonna check on the kids.


Kids are good, sound asleep. I love my beautiful sleeping children,


Is the cable box humming now? I never noticed that before.


What do I want to do with my life? Oh god, am I too old to even think that? 
I mean my life is already half way over.  


I love my job, I mean it's not my passion,but I love the people. 


What is my PASSION? 


PASSION?? Was that Elizabeth Taylors perfume?


Some old man once told me I look like a  young Elizabeth Taylor with my dark hair and blue eyes. I should google her. If I turn on my laptop will he wake up?




GO TO SLEEP!!!! STOP TALKING TO YOURSELF!!


Why am I grinding my teeth to the tune of  an Eazy E song?? 
WEEEIIIIRRRRDDD!! 
Why is 'The Boyz in the Hood' even in my brain right now?






 I should start scrapbooking more. 


I actually have alot of scrapbooking supplies. I like buying them, just don't get around to using them


Tomorrow I am going to get some of my boxes of pictures down from the rafters


How do 'Scrapbooking Mom's' find so much time to scrapbook. Who invented 'Scrapbooking?"


I don't know enough about politics,I hate when people bring it up. I can't even define myself. I am conservative,but liberal.
I'm a Conservative Liberal! That's it! 
Why can't everyone in the world just get along? I wonder what God thinks of us.
I wonder what God thinks of me
We should start going to church.
Church was sooo boring though.
Oh my god I remember when my brother ditched CCD, and the nun called my mom. My brother was BAD, but he was my hero. 
I was a good teenager..................... until my Senior year, then all bets were off


I just laughed out loud. Hope I don't wake M up. 
Do they still make Boones Farm Strawberry Hill? 
I'm gonna look next time I'm at the Liquor store.




How do smart computer people just 'KNOW' everything about computers. I wish I could suck the information out of their brain, and put it in mine. 


It's weird


I am smart. I feel like some people don't know how smart I am. Some people make me feel dumb because they are smarter than me. When people make me feel dumb,I should say 
" I was an exchange student in high school"
I actually do say that sometimes. 
I want to go back to Japan someday.


I just laughed outloud thinking of an episode of The Office. Oops hope I didn't wake M up

The Office makes me happy. I miss Michael, but the show is still funny. 


What was that noise?



Where is the baseball bat?


Oh, the Dam cat.

Everything happens for a reason



I believe that


Do I believe that?

Who made that up?



God, I'm soooo tired, and I have to go to work tomorrow. 


I wish I didn't have to work.


I need to play the lottery


I want to write a book


Who would be my main character?


Who would be my main character?


God that lady in the parking lot was soooo pissed today. I totally smiled at her too. I shouldn't have smiled the second time. She didn't deserve it. 


Sometimes I'm too nice. I wish I could be a bitch


I am a bitch to my husband sometimes
You always hurt the ones you love
Bitch Bitch Bitch 




Why am I so non-confrontational?
I am confrontational when I drink
Aren't we all? 
That's it, I could just walk around with a drink in my hand all day, like Karen on Will & Grace, with a Martini. 


I just laughed out loud again,thinking of myself with a martini glass picking K up from pre-school or walking into work. 


D would like a martini, she likes vodka. 


I hate Vodka
I would have to walk around with a Margarita or Rum & Coke

Oh god,that one time I gulped straight Vodka...........



He just rolled over. Did my laughing wake him up?


Why am I still Awake???


O.K. lets get serious about sleep. Breathe, relax. Stop thinking about stupid, weird crap!


'Since you've been gooone, I can breathe for the first time. I'm so movin oooonn, Yeah, Yeah
Thanks to you
Now I get what I waaaant
Since you've been gone'


Grinding my teeth to Kelly Clarkson, Nice!




I'm gonna cry!


I'M GOING TO CRY!! 


What was that beeping?
Is that the coffee pot turning on?
What time is it?


-crying-






Everything about me was exhausted, EVERYTHING. My brain, my eyes, my pinky toe. I love sleeping. If I went on a game show, I would be pretty excited hearing Bob Barker yell to me through his strangely long and skinny microphone..

"You have just won a lifetime supply of NAPS!!" 

"YES!!! THANK YOU"

"Or.......you can pass, and try for the BRAND NEW CAR!!"

"NOPE, I'LL TAKE THE LIFETIME OF NAPS!!!!Thanks Bob"

*lily at http://theincoherentramblingsofasingleparent.blogspot.com had a sleepless night a few nights ago. I think she jinxed me! Kidding!
Insomnia has never entered my life, never knocked at my door. But it has decided to stay. Since I wrote this a few nights ago, I have had a few sleepless nights. So This may be my theme for a bit. But Hopefully not. 

I just dropped my daughter off at pre-school and after I got back in my car realized I had 2 different colored ugg boots on. A dark brown and a light tan!!! That mixed with my flat bed head! Do you think they call CPS for unmatching fashion.

"Yes this is Sunshiny Pre-School. We would like to report a mom"

"Yes, what seems to be the problem?"

" Well, we have a mom who is usually well groomed, and looks ready for her work day. But today was a bit different. We are actually worried for the childs well being"

"Does the child have bruises, visible scars?"

"No but the mom had on TWO different colored Ugg boots. Dark Brown and Light Tan. With grey sweats, one leg tucked in the boot, the other out. And an oversized sweatshirt that had peanut butter on the arm. Well, I hope it was peanut butter."

"O.K. keep the child safe until we arrive. If the mother tries to pick her up, try to stall her. And by god, call 911 if she shows up with those hideous unmatching Uggs again.!!" 



4 comments:

  1. IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I DIDN'T DO NOTHING!

    J.R. no wonder you couldn't get to sleep with all those thoughts running through your head.

    I did laugh out loud at the randomness of your thought patterns but by the end of it, I was almost crying along with you. That level of fatigue just 'aint' funny.

    Also loved the small print. It's a post in it's own right. Really hope that you get some much needed rest soon. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are right it "ain't" funny - (I am still waiting for James Lipton to come a knockin) I'm crossing my fingers for tonight. Insomnia is sooooo not my thing!

      Delete
  2. LOVED THIS! BEEN THERE! But I'm way too old and blind to be able to read the small print.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My Lord, it was small. I did not realize I chose 'smallest' for the font. Small? Maybe, but Smallest?? Oops!
      I switched it to normal. I must have been exhausted. Still am!! Otherwise I will have to start a new blog, only for insomnia scribbles!

      Delete

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